Hii guyss!! So I know it’s been forever since I last posted (well it’s been less than a month but whatever). I know y’all missed me SO MUCH (ahahahhahah I’m so funny 💀) So I’m back with one of the books that made me cry like…A LOT. (I think I’m in a phase or something where I read books that rip my heart out and make me cry a lot. I’m doing great, trust 😭). I hope y’all are having a fantabulous day and night and lets move onto the actually reviwing part because the intro has gone on for too long (can you guys tell how excited I am? 🥰) I may or may not have stayed up until 3am reading this book (I’m JuSt A GiRl 🎀) OKOK LETS GET INTO THE BOOK PART… (also warning: i joke. A lot. I might come off as insensitive but I promise that was not my intention!)
The Fault in Our Stars meets Eleanor and Park in this exhilarating and heart-wrenching love story about a girl who learns to live from a boy who intends to die.
Theodore Finch is fascinated by death, and he constantly thinks of ways he might kill himself. But each time, something good, no matter how small, stops him.
Violet Markey lives for the future, counting the days until graduation, when she can escape her Indiana town and her aching grief in the wake of her sister’s recent death.
When Finch and Violet meet on the ledge of the bell tower at school, it’s unclear who saves whom. And when they pair up on a project to discover the “natural wonders” of their state, both Finch and Violet make more important discoveries: It’s only with Violet that Finch can be himself—a weird, funny, live-out-loud guy who’s not such a freak after all. And it’s only with Finch that Violet can forget to count away the days and start living them. But as Violet’s world grows, Finch’s begins to shrink….
This is an intense, gripping novel perfect for fans of Jay Asher, Rainbow Rowell, John Green, Gayle Forman, and Jenny Downham from a talented new voice in YA, Jennifer Niven.
TW: This book deals with suicide and death. Not just a mention or a few pages, but like the whole story. So, if that topic is triggering for you, it might be best to skip this whole book. These passages transcend “sad.” They are devastating and searing. They felt so real — so please be forewarned. (Yes i copy and pasted this TW from my review of “The Survivor Dies At The End“)
Oh my god, Jennifer Niven that ending killed me. You will be hearing from my lawyer and therapist 😭
Hmm, so there’s a girl whose name is a color (Violet) and a boy whose name makes him sound like he burst from the pages of a Shakespeare play (Theodore Finch) and they’re both super quirky, intelligent and know the names of dead poets. Then there’s that whole death thing hanging over this novel… why does sound so familiar?
oh, yes, this book is a lot like The Fault In Our Stars.
but in all seriousness
“You make me lovely and it’s so lovely, to be lovely to the one I love.”
–𝔞 𝔮𝔲𝔦𝔠𝔨 𝔰𝔲𝔪𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶–
I fell in love with Finch from the very beginning. I liked Violet too, but it’s Finch that steals the story. He is fun, crazy, seems like he is so full of life, but he’s not..
Finch and Violet meet at the top of the bell tower at school. This was not a planned meeting, this was a random meeting of two people that where thinking of jumping off a building. Can you imagine, someone messes up your suicide attempt. (nothing like those basic meet-cutes that are like ‘I was walking out of a coffee shop when I bumped into someone. Him. My mocha frappe turned his clean white shirt, brown. I look up and…wow. He’s gorgeous” or something like that. Nah, this is UNIQUE. Just the way I want to meet the love of my life [IM JOKING]) These stupid idiotic…idiots!! are yelling for Finch to jump. If I were there I would have beat the shit out of them because truly what is wrong with you? People like that give me the ick. They are icky. Anyways. Finch ends up talking Violet down from the tower but lets everyone think it’s the other way around and she is labeled as a hero. (Because he’s a gentleman like that.)
They end up being friends, but not without a lot of pushing on Finch’s part. (Like, he literally has to force her to come outside and touch some grass) Violet doesn’t really want to be around anyone too much. Her sister Eleanor was in a car crash with her almost a year ago and Eleanor died and she didn’t. Violet feels like this is her fault because she told her to take the ice-slicked bridge. So Violet has her own problems. She won’t get in a car. She’s just won’t. Finch brings out all of the good in Violet. Brings her back to herself. They do a cool report for school together where they wander around and look at wonders in their town. It’s so wonderful and I wish we had a project like that (unlike the stupid research papers we have to write)!
They do fall in love, and I was so hoping this would help Finch. But throughout the book he is still fighting these death-y feelings. He has a mom and two sisters, but they don’t see anything wrong, they just say that is Finch. He has a dad who left them for another woman and her son and he is a big jerk of a dad always saying Finch is a loser etc. (his dad can go jump off a cliff for all I care.)
I think Theodore Finch is a fantabulous character. Just like so many out there that take their lives or lose their lives. I can see how wonderful he is, but he just can’t.
I’m not going to say any more about this wonderful book but to tell everyone to read it! Read it! Understand it! Love it! These things are real! People like this are real! And there should be no room left in the world for bullies or people that don’t understand mental illnesses. Get off your stupid high horse and let others live the way they want and try to have some kindness and compassion!
–𝔪𝔶 𝔣𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰 𝔞𝔟𝔬𝔲𝔱 𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔰 𝔟𝔬𝔬𝔨–
I’m not gonna lie. I honestly don’t know how I’m supposed to write a review about this book. (well to be fair, I already wrote my thoughts as commentary in the summary part)
It made me so sad that I feel whatever I say, it just won’t be enough.
It will never do my feelings or this book justice.
The sadness I’m feeling is impossible to put into words.
It’s the kind of sadness that just grows.
The sort of sadness that makes you ache all over and draws the air from your lungs. (Literally. When I got to that one part at the ending [iykyk] about the blue hole, I was eating, and I literally choked on my food.)
Maybe it’s because this book hit way too close to home.
Maybe it’s because I knew exactly how Violet felt.
Maybe it’s because in some not-so-small way Theo reminded me so much of myself.
His actions, the fact that he embraced life more than everyone else around him!
That he saw the beautiful things in our grey world and vehemently refused to succumb to the ugly things that sometimes make it so hard to live. (This is kind of the part where I relate. I’d say I’m a pretty sunshine-y person. I usually try my best to look at the good side of life. The silver lining. I’m that one person who’s always joking around and laughing.)
Finch fought for every single moment and to watch his constant fight genuinely broke my heart.
They were meant to be. But sometimes “meant to be” doesn’t mean that its gonna be forever. Sometimes someone comes into your life just to teach you something. Sometimes a person isn’t the forever but it’s what you learn from them.
Jennifer Niven didn’t just make me love this book because of the story. It’s because of how she managed to put such intense and strong feelings in it. From the first page, I was literally yanked in and shoved down memory lane.
This book made me think. It made me feel. This book made me hurt. But in a good way, if that makes sense. (I pinkie promise I’m not psycho or something.)
I am not perfect. I have secrets. I am messy. Not just my bedroom but me. No one likes messy. They like smiling Violet.
I’ve read this book a few times. The first time I read it was 2 years ago. My teacher let me borrow it and warned me that the book might make me cry and she was so right. It still makes me cry. And there were some parts that I got tears in my eyes and I have no clue why! Like, I think it was yesterday, and I was thinking about the scene with the wall that said, ‘Before I die…’ and my eyes started stinging.
I walk into my closet and shut the door. Inside, I try not to take up too much space or make any noise, because if I do, I may wake up the darkness, and I want the darkness to sleep. I’m careful when I breathe so as not to breathe too loudly. If I breathe too loudly, there’s no telling what the darkness will do to me or to Violet or to anyone I love.
So, when I finished this book, I didn’t ugly cry like curl up into a ball and sob my lil heart out. Nah. First of all, that’s not really my style. Second, I just kinda floated around in the ache. Because I literally felt like the real me was literally chopped out and put on a stage for people to see.
Be the person I’m meant to be and have that be enough.
This book was just so beautiful,
Lowkey Life Changing,
hopeful,
powerful,
heart-aching,
crushing,
funny,
deep,
etc.
Now. Should you read it?
HUNDRED PERCENT YESS
But it might rip your heart into little pieces, put it back together and repeat.
I learned that there is good in this world, if you look hard enough for it. I learned that not everyone is disappointing, including me, and that a 1,257-foot bump in the ground can feel higher than a bell tower if you’re standing next to the right person
XOXO
Aaradhyaa
Aaradhyaa.blog 